Struggling With Your Children Over Video Games? Why You Should Stop!
The most difficult things for me to understand being a mom is the way involved my girls are in video games. As a child I wasn’t very big on video games, I was much more focused on reading and playing outside. Sure, I had a video game system as a kid, however it did not entice me as it does to my girls.
Like several parents out there, I fought endlessly with my girls about video games. My girls were captivated with them; they always aspired to find the coolest gaming console as well as newest games, although Barbie video games were their favorite. I can remember when my youngest received Barbie: The Island Princess for the DS for her birthday 1 year. Immediately after she opened that Barbie video game, no other presents mattered. With her new Barbie game on hand, off she left for her room where she remained for what seemed hours.
I was literally in awe over this strange hold that video games appeared to have over the kids. I had read all the warnings in parents’ magazines that talk about how bad video games were for the children. I had even seen numerous reports in news reports discussing the very same things and how several studies had been done. With this not so great news about games, I was going to stop them inside my house. I grounded my girls from games for days at a time, sent them outside to hang out in the sun. I signed them up for dance lessons, took them over to the park, to put it differently, I exhausted myself wanting to distract them from the computer games they seemed to love a lot.
As you can imagine this battle against online games inside my house was exhausting. It seemed like whatever I did I really could not change my girls’ minds over computer games. I am not the kind of parent who gives in to her children or am I the type to quit while I want something. However, it looked like this battle against on-line games was going to defeat me. So, rather than attempting to fight their obvious desire for Barbie video games together with the pleasure these games gave them, I made a decision to check them out.
I grabbed my daughters DS and her Barbie Groom and Glam Pups game, the latest favorite Barbie video game, and started playing it. I probably got about a few minutes in the video game and was at a total loss in regards to what to do. It’s no surprise that that video games still baffled me as an adult. Instead of chuck the game down in disgust I called my daughter inside the room to help me out. The surprise on the face when she saw me playing her video game was priceless.
My daughter sat down with me and patiently explained to me things I was supposed to do. Before I knew it I was having a lot fun, sitting there giggling and laughing with my daughter, and I was even finding pleasure in a video game. My daughter and I probably sat there for a couple of hours, before I remembered that it was way past time to put together dinner on the table. I immediately jumped up to go cook dinner, but seeing the look on my own daughters face made me stop short.
Rather than rushing out directly into kitchen, I sat down to talk with my daughter. My daughter was confused. She wasn’t able to understand why I’d stop playing video games with her to go cook dinner because we have been having a good time. Oh how nice it truly is to be young! In place of just leaving her puzzled, I told her that yes I’m having fun, however I needed to address my responsibilities as well, basically if I decided not to prepare dinner, nobody would eat. Also, I reassured her that after dinner we were able to sit down and play a few more video games.
You see by taking some time to recognise my kids’ pleasure in video games, I was capable of seeing things I had never witnessed before. Video games may very well be fun, even more fun than reading a novel. However, I still was on a pursuit to curb how much my kids played video games. Now I understood why they liked them. I found myself even enjoying them. Nevertheless, that did not mean I supported my children playing them nonstop, I knew that boundaries would have to be set.
In talking with my husband, who probably enjoyed online games a whole lot more than the kids did, we thought we would set up a family game night, only we chosen to do it two nights each week. Two times a week after dinner my daughters would go pick their favorite Barbie video game, which surely each one had her favorite. My youngest daughter loved the Barbie: Island Princess video game, while my older daughter preferred Barbie Groom and Glam Pups. We all took turns selecting the games for family night. And, in the process, every person benefited from spending some more time together as a family.
Something I learned, as a parent out of this experience is the fact that trying to ban something usually isn’t worth the battle, I favor to save my battles for the really big things. By taking some time to listen to the children and open up my mind, I realized that all the studies were just that a couple of studies, only I understand the kids, and only I can decide if video games are hurting my kids. Now I have come to realize that video games are amazing, they can even be experienced together. Therefore, although we never fight over whether or not video games must be played. We all do have issues with moderating how much time is allocated to video games. Now I won’t lose that battle. Pretty much everything needs moderation!
Tags: Barbie, children, computer games, education, games, girls games, hobbies, home, indoor activities, kids, online game, online games, parenting, Video Games